A few days ago I made a joke about my friend’s outfit, and she’s still really mad about it, even after I apologized sincerely. I think she’s being overly dramatic, but her friendship matters a lot to me. What should I do?
This question brings me back to when I was a first-year eight years ago. The summer before I first arrived at the College, I had sustained a hairline fracture to my left femur, so I used crutches to get around. My entry theme was “Willy 3: Cooking-Oriented Pranks,” so a couple of my entry-mates — with whom I had just started to get along — decided to play a game called “ButterCrutch,” which involved them secretly slathering the bottoms of my crutches with butter in the dead of night. Long story short, I ended up violently tumbling down three flights of stairs and sustaining another hairline fracture to my other femur. So, what I mean is, sometimes a good-natured joke has unintended consequences. You already apologized, so give your friend time. It’s in her hands now. If she wants to move on, I’m sure she’ll let you know.
Looking to walk onto the football team. No experience, but I watch a lot of games. How will this work? Thanks.
Good news and bad news, pal. The bad news is that the football team here doesn’t take walk-ons. The good news is that you wouldn’t have made it anyways. Some more good news is that Williams has lots of club sports (rugby, frisbee, soccer) that might quench your thirst to see yourself on a poster or shove somebody into the dirt. Alternatively, if football means that much to you, there are ways to get involved outside of playing such as contributing to the sports section of a little-known school newspaper called The Williams Record.
Howdy Ephelia, should I take three lab courses next semester? Or maybe four labs? I love labs. Thanks.
Howdy clueless first-year, great question. Back in the spring of my junior year, I had biology and chemistry labs every Monday. I didn’t actually select any biology or chemistry lectures, but the registrar must have made a mistake, and I never spoke up about it because I was scared that they would yell at me. Anyway, I just kept showing up, but my chemistry lab was so strenuous that, by the time I’d arrive at my biology lab, I was always completely exhausted. Long story short, on the third lab of the semester I ended up accidentally centrifuging a fully-grown, fully-living frog. Don’t make the mistake of thinking that every class is the same amount of work; my rule of thumb is to treat lab courses as if they were around 1.5 classes when planning my schedule. But, if you really do love labs that much, go for it. Take three. It’s been done before. Just make sure you know what you’re getting yourself into before drop/add period ends.
Hey Ephelia. I tried to start up an ’80s dance club but nobody wanted to join, so I gave up. Please help me.
Hey buddy. I’m saddened by this report. You deserve better. This also reminds me of the spring of my senior year, when I attempted to found the Williams College League of Competitive Cup-and-Ball Enthusiasts, but it was personally vetoed by someone extremely high-up in the administration. My advice is to keep fighting. If you want it badly enough, others will see your fire and subsequently be lit on fire themselves (metaphorically speaking). If you’re just after getting funky in a more general sense, make sure to check out some of the dance-oriented RSOs around campus. But don’t let your dreams wither and die in a slow, grotesque display of failure as I once did. Touch the sky, you righteous disco dude.
Hey ephelia yesterday i got done with lacrosse practice and i was messing around at the lunch table and i didn’t mean to but i poured out most of the salt shaker into my eye and i tried to wash it out with water from the sink but it didn’t work and so then i remembered that you can stop salt with other acid atoms so i put some orange juice in my eye because of the acid but it didnt work and it hurt so i tried to get the orange juice out with a napkin but the napkin got soggy and so then i got a chunck of napkin stuck in my eye so theyres a napkin in my eye now and then i remembered that you can get toothpaste on cars to make them clean so i put some toothpaste in my eye but then it got hard to see and i was really tired and it really hurt so i went to bed and i woke up this morning and i coulnt see good and my friend said that my eye was orange and purple and it still really hurts and i cant go to class and i dont know what to do
Please go to the hospital.
