Each week, we randomly select a unix from a list of all current students at the College. So long as the owner of the selected unix is on campus, willing to be interviewed and not a member of the Record board, that person becomes the subject of that week’s One in Two Thousand. This week, the computer (using a very simple script in R) chose Ronni Ramos ’23.

You took Humor Writing over Winter Study. What was that like?

It was really, really fun. It was really cool to learn how to write in a different style. It was super fun to get to hear what everybody would come up with every week, and I really loved that we were given different topics to write about.

And how do you think the final showcase went?

I think it was awesome! There was a great turnout, and it was really cool to see what everybody picked as what they thought was their best piece, and to see everyone’s reactions to the different pieces.

Do you think that this is something you’d want to keep doing in the future?

I think it would be really fun to keep writing. I’ve also continued submitting captions to the New Yorker cartoon caption contest.

That’s cool! What did you do over Dead Week?

I went to Manhattan, which was so cool. I got to go to the Met, which I’ve wanted to go to for years, and I got to see some of the paintings that I’ve been studying for a while. Super, super cool. The subway system was pretty cool, getting to figure that out.

Which subway lines did you take?

[Laughs.] I don’t remember… I took the C line a bunch, I think. I was primarily on yellow and blue.

Love it. Moving on: You’re on Mock Trial. What’s that like?

It’s interesting. This year, I’m a witness.

What does that mean?

I’m pretending to be two witnesses to the crime. It’s cool because I get to pretend to be the owner of a campground and also a hiker who was there.

What inspired you to join?

I’ve always been interested, and then an opportunity presented itself, and I jumped on it. I’m thinking about maybe going into law.

That’s cool! How’s softball going?

I’m super excited for season, which is about to start. It’s just around the corner. Yeah, I’m excited for in-season practices and getting to finally start playing games.

You’re from Murphy, Texas. What’s it like going to college in the Northeast?

It’s really cold. I’m freezing all the time, but I really like the people here, and the school. I just have so much fun. The classes are great. I really miss the food.

What’s your favorite Southern dish?

It’s gotta be a tie between brisket and chicken-fried steak. It’s delicious. With cream gravy.

What’s your favorite thing about Texas, if you had to choose?

I guess I just sort of miss Southern culture. Just like, I don’t know, I miss people wearing cowboy boots. Really, what I miss most, and my favorite thing about Texas, is the food, but I don’t wanna keep saying that. [Laughs.] Yeah, my favorite thing is probably food, and I miss Southern hospitality.

What’s a cool childhood memory you have? I hear there’s something about armadillos?

Yeah. A couple of years ago, my mom and I caught two armadillos in our backyard.

Wow.

They burrow.

What are you watching on Netflix right now?

I am obsessed with Peaky Blinders. It is so addicting. It makes me want to live in World-War-One-era industrial England.

Interesting. And, because we’ve watched The Bachelor together, I’m interested: Who are you rooting for?

You know, I was — honestly, this season I’m completely indifferent. [Laughs.] You know, I would say I’m rooting for Hannah Ann at this point. Kelley is too good for Peter, and Hannah Ann, I think, could be happy with him. No, that sounds so mean! [Laughs.]

What was the highlight of your past week?

I had a really fun time just hanging in the croom with all my friends after hearing what they did over Dead Week.

So, you’re in the entry Sage EF, formerly themed “Small Electric Fans.” I’ve heard that someone changed the theme to “Sexually Empowered Females.” Any guesses as to who did that?

[Laughs.] Am I supposed to call people out here? I really have absolutely no idea!

Which Sexually Empowered Female do you have on your door?

I have Doja Cat.

Interesting. And what’s your opinion on Doja Cat?

I’m very happy I got Doja Cat. I think she’s freakin’ awesome. I’ve been listening to Hot Pink on repeat, which is her album.

Did you watch the Super Bowl?

I did!

Who were you rooting for?

I didn’t have any strong opinions about who I wanted to win the Super Bowl, but I really enjoyed the Halftime show. I really only watch the Super Bowl for the commercials, anyway.

Did you like any of the commercials?

I loved the Jason Momoa one. That was fantastic, where he took off his muscles, his hair and the shoes that made him tall.

Which is your favorite Snar place, between Whitmans’, Lee’s and ’82 Grill?

Oh my God. See, I feel like this is a hot take, but I’m a Whitmans’ girl all the way.

I’m with you. What’s your Snar order?

Hmm. Buffalo chicken tenders and [fried] green beans.