One in Two Thousand: Bex Bacchioni ’10

Bex Bacchioni ’10, a self-proclaimed ‘Paresky pack rat’, met me Saturday on Paresky lawn. Surrounded by a posse of Williams ’09s, Bacchioni brought me to a room on the second floor of Paresky for our interview.

This is a pretty important interview – get excited.
Yeah, I told my friends. I was like, “I’ve got an interview for 1 in 2000.” And they were like, “Oh, we thought it was for a job …” Nope. I’ll probably throw in a personal plug for some employment at some point – just a warning. That is, if after reading this interview, anyone would want to hire me.

Any plans for next year already?
No. I think I want to dance on a cruise ship. I’m serious. I’d just be down to dance for a couple of months and be on a cruise at the same time. Meet some new people, get some tips … whatever. Anything can happen. Possibly meet a rich older man who thinks I’m some poor, uneducated know-nothing dancer and wants to buy me diamonds – that’s cool. Nah, not diamonds. I don’t know what I’d want a rich guy to buy me. Maybe if I like the cruise enough, I’ll just want a yacht. Then I could pay dancers … oh no, that sounds like strippers.

Does a certain cruise suit your fancy?

I’ve been on a Royal Caribbean one before and it was pretty fun. Five months dancing on a cruise ship, doing nothing. I think it would be great. I did Royal Caribbean in the ninth grade.

And this left a mark?

Oh yeah. It was the first time that I was kind of cool, and then I wasn’t cool again until many years later.

Anything in particular that resparked your coolness?
Being surrounded by other uncool people.
At Williams?
Yeah. Being surrounded by fellow nerds, you have a bigger chance of being cool. Not that I am cool, but you know … you’ve got a chance to make your new mark at Williams.

That is promising. So you had wanted to meet on Paresky lawn. Is that one of your favorite places on campus?
I would say Paresky is one of my stomping grounds. I’ve been a Paresky pack rat ever since it opened during my freshman year. I get made fun of it a bit – someone called me the Mayor of Paresky once. When I was a freshman, Paresky wasn’t around, so when it opened in February, we were all so stoked and would come and sit here for 10 hours at a time. You would see everyone you had never seen before. All these junior guys were coming back from abroad and you’re like, “Hey, what’s up,” and you could just see all these people and it never stopped.

Paresky seems to light lots of people’s fires.
Oh yeah, well they used to have First Fridays here. So, I guess one could say sh– went down.

That’ll be a great quote.
Oops.

I want to discuss two of your Facebook profile pictures. First, the shooting picture.
I visited my friend in Colorado for spring break, and she likes to shoot shotguns. So I asked her to take me, and I was kind of terrified, but it was pretty awesome. We needed photographic evidence and I had a friend who made fun of me for wearing pink because I’m not a girly-girl. I decided that with this gun, I had to wear pink. They had the clay flying thingies and I’m still convinced I got one. My friend told me that I didn’t, but I think that I’m a pretty good shooter.

Good, so you’re now fully able to shoot a rifle.
Yeah, I’m pretty sure I was shaking the entire time. But then, members of the Colorado State Shotgun Team came and asked me to be on the team. So, I mean, I must have been pretty good. Although I don’t think they saw me, and I think it was more related to the female factor, but I was pretty impressed with myself.

That is pretty awesome. First time shooting and already a –
Pro. Pro.

All right, a pro. Then also, your second profile picture was Lady Gaga?
Yes, my friends and I dressed up as her for Halloween. Different influences for each Lady Gaga. None of them really worked out that well, and one of my friends looked like Malibu Barbie.

What was the idea behind the different Lady Gagas?
Mine was “Poker Face,” and I was wearing a blond wig but people kept taking it off. I really do want to be blond one day. I had some hair experiments go terribly awry sophomore year. Anyway, we all had influences from different videos and it kind of just turned into who can wear as much pleather as possible, and sequins, and who had the best blond wig. Then we just all looked like tranny messes – I don’t know if that’s PC enough. It was a big hit. It’s funny because at Williams everyone dresses up really cute, and we are in these mildly promiscuous whatevers, but it was a good night all around.

What inspired this obsession with Lady Gaga?
I want to be Lady Gaga. Actually, I don’t want to be Lady Gaga. Well, I do. She’s great. I don’t know. Just look at her – she’s nuts. I wasn’t big on the covering of the face phase but, in general, I just think she’s great. I’m impressed with the no pants thing a lot.

What else besides Lady Gaga is driving you right now?
Neon. It’s a good look for the spring.

Favorite color?
Green. I wore a specific neon green shirt every other day this past summer. I have two of the same shirt now so I was able to alternate. I just love neon.

There’s just no stopping neon. You mentioned some hair experiments?
Well, they weren’t exactly experiments. It was store-bought dye. Apparently my hair doesn’t turn light brown, it turns light brown-red. So that was fun. Then I dyed it back, and something with the water and the sun turned it another color, and then I had this mane of blond-ish hair. So I figure one day I just have to go fully for the blond.
Go big or go home?
Oh definitely.

Is that sort of your philosophy for life?
Oh yeah. For sure.

[Half way through our interview, the lights in the office turned off. Bex put her Paresky pack rat experience to the test, prancing around the room and informing me that “we just haven’t been mobile enough.” Miraculously, the lights reappeared and our interview was able to continue.]

There we go …
I know the ins and outs of Paresky.

Yeah, I’ve heard recently about people breaking into steam tunnels.
I’ve looked for them before but never found a way in. I’m not handy with the breaking in thing. I don’t want to be in the Spring Street Blues and one in 2000 in one week.

However, that could be pretty epic.
Well, let it happen. My goal is to be on every page of the Record. Athlete of the week. Or Dancer of the Week instead.

Let’s talk about food. Would you say you have a good appetite?
I can definitely clean house when it comes to food. I eat inordinate amounts of cannoli in one sitting.

Are cannoli your favorite?
I just want a tower of cannoli. If I ever have a party, which I generally don’t, but for my birthday or something, I want a cupcake tower filled instead with cannoli. Maybe for my half birthday.

Half birthdays are definitely relevant.
Entirely, because when you were little you’d tell everyone how old you are down to the half. I’m 21 now, and I think I’ll be turning 21 for the next 10 years, so the half is important to let people know where in the 21 you are. And then in 10 years, I’ll be 22. You’ve got to be real. Can’t pretend to be 21 forever.

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