One In 2000: Ben Chaffee

Place of Origin: Adams, MA

Current Residence: Morgan Mid-West

Five Favorite Movies?

Why do you always ask movies? Can’t you ask TV Shows or books or bubble gum?

It’s one of my basic questions.

Alright. I’m not a big movie guy. I’d say The Edge, Back to the Future-

Are you serious? That’s like my favorite movie of all time. Now I love you a lot more. Go on.

As much as that frightened me. . . Jeopardy from 1953. [Long pause]

Is that it? Three favorite movies?

The Predator.

That’s four.

Okay. One more. . . Well, four favorite movies.

Okay. Now remember-

Take a Haircut.

There you go, five. Remember, there are no right or wrong answers. Got it?


What’s the biggest event of the last week?

Hmmm. . . Steve did his laundry.


Into the Woods.

Wrong. Try again.

My radio show.

Wrong. Do you give up?

Never. . .. all right, I give up.

The new Star Wars trailer came out.

Oh, of course!

Do you plan on seeing it?

I imagine it would be inevitable.

So you’re not hyped up for this Star War thing?


Do you want it to beat Titanic?

I don’t care. . . What’s up with all the movie question?

I’m getting to other questions. . . Do you like Subway?

As in the one here?


Never eaten there. Well, once, two years ago.

Have you heard the rumor that it might be shut down?


What do you think of that?

Doesn’t bother me.

Is there anything you care about?

I care about the American Ideal. I care about my family and my friends. I care about the way my room smells or the way my hair looks. Other than that, sure there are things I care about. But I don’t know if I want everyone reading about them in the newspaper.

What’s the American Ideal? In your humble opinion.

In my humble opinion, the American Ideal is finishing your life feeling you have accomplished something.

How does your room smell?

Distinctive. I wouldn’t say sophisticated distinctive. More like if I was away for awhile and I came back and smelled it again I’d be like “Whoa! I’d recognize that smell anywhere. It’s distinctive.”

Do you partake in any extra curriculars here at Williams?

I run cross country and track and I have a radio show with Topher Goggin.

What’s you favorite activity?

I’d have to say all you can eat night at Papa Gino’s.

Papa Gino’s?

Boston’s favorite pizza. There’s one in P-Town and one in N.A. Tuesday nights 5 to 9 you get all the pizza you want, large drink, it costs little more than $5 and you can eat until the place closes.


Pittsfield, you fool.

I didn’t know that. . . What’s your favorite activity here at Williams?

Watching Steve kick Serafin out of the room.

How does he do it?

Steve will be hard at work. Then he’ll hear a knock on the door. Steve can tell whose at the door just by the sound of the knock. So Serafin will come in and say he’s looking for me. Steve gets up, pulls tufts of his own hair, and kicks him out.

What are you doing for Spring Break?

Going home.

Looking forward to anything in particular?

Playstation, pizza, start of Major League Baseball ’99.

Is there something you’d rather be doing for Spring Break?

If I was playing baseball for the Boston Red Sox that would be my ideal Spring Break.

Do you play on any teams?

Just on the Playstation.

Are you a major league player on the Playstation?

No, I get my butt kicked every time.

Whose your favorite superhero?

I’d have to say Superman.

Any reason?

Lois Lane is hot.

So, is there anything you want to tell the campus?

[Long, contemplative pause]

Maybe a quote, or words to live by, or a story?

I can tell you a story. I only live about 10 miles from Williams and I was never really sure if I would go to school here. Obviously it’s a great school and I’ve heard about it since I was four years old. So when it came down to deciding where to go to school I chose Williams and I never sure if I made the right choice. Then, last November I was out for a run and I had an especially large lunch. At about a couple of miles into it I got struck with the worst case of explosive P.D. I have ever had in my life.


The Poop Disease, you dolt. So there I am, I can barely move. I’m practically waddling down the road. The whole team has dusted me and I’m about three miles from campus. I’m looking around, looking at the woods, wondering if I should knock on someone’s door, wondering how long it would take me to get back to campus before the impending emergency. Then all of a sudden, out of nowhere, on this back road, this junky car starts honking its horn and nearly run me off the road. I’m looking at this guy, he pulls over to the side, rolls down the window and yells out my name. I walk over and this is one of my friends from high school who had already dropped out of college and moved into the middle of the woods to learn about nature. He was driving to Williamstown for a dentist appointment and just happened to pass by my. I said “Oh my God, let me in the car, I can’t believe you stopped by, I have the worst case of P.D., take me home.” He did and forever I am glad I went to Williams and not some far away school.

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