Williamstown Residence: Arnold Street, right around the corner from the Spirit Shop.
Favorite Color of Beverage: The dark, ready-brownie color of a nice beer.
Seven-word Motto: I don’t really have a motto, actually.
Favorite Hotel in a Planned City in India: The Hotel Amar.
What was the most enjoyable Williams event you’ve attended this semester?
‘1953,’ because the 100 Days party [was not fun]. I don’t know if you can put that in the newspaper, but 100 Days literally [was clearly not fun]. That was my interpretation of the party, of course.
What law would you most like to break?
There’s this law in my hometown, a really old law in Shaker Heights, OH. There are three of them actually. You can’t spit on the sidewalk, which I do all the time, so I guess that’s not really a law I want to break, and you can’t swear in front of women, which I also do all the time. And, technically – this is the law I think is really funny – if more than three women live in a house alone, even if they’re related to each other, that’s against the law, because it could be a house of prostitution.
A house of ill fame?
Indeed. It’s just this ridiculous law that’s still around because no one’s gotten around to changing it. So I guess that I would like to move into a house with four women. That would make a total of five women all living in the same house in flagrant violation of the law. And we could hang a big neon sign outside that flashes “House of Ill Fame.”
What do you think prospective students should know about Williams?
They should know that the library closes at nine o’clock on Fridays and Saturdays in an effort to encourage us to go out and have fun. The school is really concerned about our welfare, socially and emotionally, I mean, I think that’s great. Basically, if we’re in the Library at nine o’clock on Friday or Saturday, they’ll kick us out. They’ll boot us out and we have to go find something else to do. They ring a loud bell and flash the lights at us and force us to stop reading and go socialize.
Apparently one of my friends saw a tour guide explaining this and making it seem like the closing of the library at nine o’clock is a great, beneficent thing, like this is a great example of the Williams administration showing its caring policies.
Is that a grilled honeybun you’re eating?
No. But I’d like to grill your honeybun.
If you could change the name of one country, what country would that be, and what name would you give it?
Can I change the names of two countries?
I would change Turkey’s name to Chile and Chile’s name to Turkey, because people would be really confused.
Is there anything I’ve forgotten to ask?
Oh, a number of things…